I'm stressed,stressed, stressed!!!!!
So many things to do, yet so little time.
Today some pple uncovered some secret abt some one very black. hee hee. I cant believe when u put 8 girls together in the toilet u get total explosion of noise and laughter. That's what happened today. It was too hilarious. lolx. And tat lasted all the way to class. :) oh thanks XN and WQ for running/walking with me today!
Oh yeah the class Gp papers have been found. On miss ng's desk!!~ She got total shocked too. haha at least dun have to redo.
Bloody hell, what in the world is tat SC guy doing?? I am suppose to have my locker since last week. But it is spoilt. Chirag suppose to help me get a new one, but it's been over a week le and that stupid Alex or whatever his name is hasnt given me a new locker. grrrrr.....
Tml celebrating TYS bdae after sch,after lib duty and after lib meeting. humph. So in the end i think i'll reach suntec at 5pm?? Wah lao. Sure super sianz, cuz tml got math test and Chem pract!Sat buying clothes. So that leaves sun to do work. Cham ar. I'm dead ...sooooooo many things to do sia. Plus mon got bio SPA assessment!! *faints*
CNY Carnival @ TJC, tixs $5( coupon) on 4/2/05,4-8pm. Interested pls inform me by Fri.
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
10:31 pm
Thanks eunice for the taufik and SHE cds :)
This morning received rach's msg, she's stranded at tampines!! lolx. Okie so i went to 'rescue' her, even though i was pretty late. And yes i didnt get to see the vj guy, :(
Anyways blur blur rachael...hee...Well during 3 periods of slacking, went to PE dept to clear MC, saw Mrs Goh instead. So she helped me and we chatted in the Pe room. She's giving birth this weekend !!! So fast! She's one of my fav teacher, young and pretty and nice. It's gg to be a boy!lol. And we arranged to go scuba diving one day after i got my certificate and of cuz after my 'A's.
So cool.!~ Realised that there is so much more to life..really want to see the other areas of the world. Away from all the stress and shallowness of the urban life...
Oh found a interesting website on eunice's blog. Can listen to pple sing songs and rate them!haha...
Okie Mrs ho sort of lost the class's GP essays when janice just handed up to her this morning. hmm..I think she too bz lah...hopefully she can find them lorz...But when told her abt wat happened to my family, she's very understanding and patient and i'm thankful for that.
After sch,went hm with rach then did some work at rivervale mall cuz she didnt bring her keys..blur blur girl!!!!!!!! haha. Was so tired later on so went hm first.
Missed 4/2 so much! haha. Okie i need a top for CNY. Oh and 1 week more to me bdae!! :P
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
8:38 pm
Okie realised that i was really emotional yesterday, but ya was very fan. Now's better Ar mah's face not tat swollen anymore cuz she let out a lot of urine after they gave her a shot. Tml gg to see her again after sch. Next week is gg to be so stressful man! :(
On a lighter note, i managed to open the scuba diving pics!!Check
them out.
21/04 pixs are in the last album.
Listening to instructor :P
It's me! hi!~~ :P
21/04 gals!
Me agaiN!
Throwing discs underwater! :)
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
12:43 pm
Fucking doctor. How can he any how take away impt drug??Curse him. Just when i thought that everything was normal again, that life was getting better again, this thing has to happen. Yesterday, granny's face was so swollen that her eyes and cheeks were so puffy. So mum and aunt took her to check up today. Then she complained of breathing difficulty this morning, like almost dying like tat. So she was hospitalised. It was due to water retention. The fucking doc didnt give her the medicine to excrete the fluid inside her body, as a result her body system cannot tahan, her heart too.........................freak freak freak. My dad come hm from hosp and now she go in. Wl. When will this ever stop. Dun know what my family do to deserve this. Is it our karma?????Mum is so stressed. She cannot take any more leave all her leaves are used up for this yr and it is like only JAN!! Wl. We got 2 sick pple at hm, cannot afford to just think abt ourselves. I cannot take it any more la.......no more hospital liaoz pls. Been gg in and out, SGH,CGH, i know ever corner and toilet and blah blah of these places. Freak. Just cannot control my emotions. Sorry but i just had to pour out all these feelings cuz i cannot shw it when my parents are ard. It's like never ending. Cant we even just take a breather????? If such thing happen again i confirm will be breaking dwn. Now I am on the verge anyways. Just stop all these bad stuff......
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
7:00 pm
Select your birth month and cross out whatever that doesnt apply~
FEBRUARY:
Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever.
Changing personality.
Attractive.
Sexy. Temperamental.
Quiet shy and humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted.
Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and
easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but those not show it. Dislike unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizing dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside.
Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions.
Quite interesting and fun lolx. :P
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
8:16 pm
Trying to open the web site for the scuba diving pixs~~Yup the underwater+scuba gear pixs...but seems that there's smthin wrong with the webby...*sad*
It's hard to find yourself drifting apart, even though you cannot help it. But things are sometimes not within your control. Besides, we are all in a different world now, and have different priorities in life. Work,study,commitments and stuff. Someone once told me that i should not think so much abt it, i know because sacrifices have to be made. I cannot afford to fail again. Time is not on my side. Sometimes it may seem i dun care, i dun bother or i did not make an effort. It's not easy on my part too, to make such decisions, to sacrifice life and frens for studies. But do u think i wanted it that way?? Do u think i wud not want to be part of everything and to share the laughter,joy,sadness and sorrows and everything else?? I do not have the confidence in balancing all these things together and therefore something has to be sacrificed. And with all , i have to be a even more introvert person. Yes i changed. MAybe. But circumstances can change a person. I think the only person i can rely on is myself and yes me me me only. I often dream though that i am with everybody. That none of the bad things have happened b4. That i can still see everybody as often as i like. Alas, it was all yet a dream.....
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
5:56 pm
Haha now at sch comp lab slack. Haiz. Yesterday was almost late for swimming. Received an sms early morning from sch system informing us to wear red for the whole day. lol. Like national day celebration like tat. Well this is to celebrate the LIONS's win in the Tiger cup lol. YEAH!!!!!!!! We are the champions!! Was really glad that singapore could clinch the cup right at homeground. YUp yup the Lions played well and it was a deserving win.Oh and so i wore the TJC 25/03 class Tee, cuz that's the only 'red' shirt i have!~~ :P
Went to intermediate for swimming. Blah want to die. I dun know how to swim free style then Mr sim wanted us to change strokes. Dun care i anyhow swim. lol. This year got so many pple in intermediate lor. Haiz, but i think beginners better cuz more slack. Haiz. *sad*
Gp lesson was fun as usual. Cuz we get to listen to Mrs Ho's stories. She is very knowledgeable, and very very open. lolx. Oh and Yq didnt bring the bio practs again. And i think Miss ng was quite pissed le cuz if he lost the practs we will have to do all over again. Blah.
Did my bio test in the lib. Wl some stupid yr 1 or IP pple damn noisy. Really they think lib is kopitiam or wat. The librarian warned them twice liaoz still like tat. Then disturb me do my test. sian. Haiz.
Dad's weight has gone dwn again. Tummy is shrinking. Cannot beat le. But i think is better more healthy. Haha this week is gg out week. So many things happening. Looking forward!!!!!
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
9:03 am
HAPPY BDAE OHMY!!!!!!!!~~~~~~~~~
I'm sick sick sick................. :_(
Just hope i dun flunk the test and tat the bio pract can be found soon.
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
6:25 pm
Been waiting for the weekends for a long time. Finally can rest le. Wl super exhausted this week. First time i really am physically and mentally exhausted outside exam period. Been waking up so early everyday tat's why. Tue and wed like tat really quite bad. Got mood swings la, then preparing for today's chem test really stressed, doing wrk rushing to SHG etc really feels like hell. But wed had an interesting GP lesson with Mrs. Ho*winks*. SPA start liaoz le...also sianz...oh i was scolded bu stupid D.Ng during assembly. Stupid oil tank. The yr 1s damn noisy man..but the IP students so cute!! Haha they wearing uniform liaoz but yr 1s not yet. Their orientation Tee very and file very nice! White colour file then the Tee is the Tj logo at the back and the words are spread across the front. Shall ask Alvin to get one for me, haha.
YEAH! DAD IS DISCHARGED FROM THE HOSPITAL!!!!!!!!!! so happy he can come home today!!! It's actually quite fast. So glad he's better. Just saw the large wounds on his body..scary...haha but came home safely that's wats more impt!
Hai i cannot tahan want to slp le...still have bio diagnostic test on mon i wan to die!!!! Hopefully next week will be better cuz no more tests coming after bio.
Yeah swimming on mon! :P
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
5:45 pm
This morning stupid me took the wrng bus to sch. I was so happy that there were many seats available. I closed my eyes to rest then when i opened them i realised that i was at a unfamiliar environment!! I was like passing by this XX pri sch and stuff which i shudnt if i had taken 27. And then i realised that i was at Pasir Ris and that was becuz i had taken 89 instead!!!! Wl i really panicked. Luckily i saw the MRT statn and alighted. Eventually still manage to meet up with rachael at TM. Went sports complex to rot cuz we super early. Crazy girl still wana run when she injured. lolx.
Sian la today whole day rot. Met the cousellor just now to talk, felt much better after confiding in her.....
Minah HAPPY EARLY BDAE TO U!~
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
2:55 pm
HAPPY BIRTHDAY WEIQIN MUMMIE~~~~~~~~
These past few days were really difficult, but things are getting better and today i feel like i'm back to my old self again. haha. Cuz dad's getting better!
Met rachie on my way to sch today, (hey i hope ur muscle ache dun so fast recover so we can go sch tgt everyday! *evils*) haha just kidding! Super suay. 1st time gg sch tgt then the bus was late at Tanah merah for 15 mins. So ended up super pack, some poor fellows cant board, so they confirm late lolx.
Today in sch cant tap my ez link, they informed us that since last yr the net work got prob, so some of da '86 pple's testimonial got prob cuz attendence is very messy. Haha see la technology may not always be reliable.Then mass pe. Haiz the white haired old man(mr. sim) told us the same old story again. He says it every year, doesnt he get tired of repeating?? hmm. haha. But he was quite funny, he even make fun of the IP students running the road run. Meanie!~TJ is overcrowded man, there's no space for the Ip students la then everyday these poor kids have to stand on both sides of the road near the flag pole. lolx.
And
YU QING SHAVED HIS HEAD BALD!!!! okie still got tiny winy hair la but botak also. Then he came late for assembly and rushed to line up. He created such a commotion man. haha. All the teachers and girls and guys were like so shocked and stunned to see this botak guy. Me and xn also shocked. lolx. Then miss teoh was giggling non-stop blah.
Afterwards, Gina went to try on the top and skirt we bought for her. Yeah so sexy. Glad she like them. Later on had Gp, met our new CT, Miss ho. Okie i realised she is a very funny and nice teacher. At least the first impression was pretty good and i think i see hope in my GP. And ya she is strict but i feel she can really teach us well. Plus she seemed approachable. 2 periods on listening to her stories and stuff, okie la quite interesting.
Bio was in TRC again. Seminar style mah. Actually i find this way of teaching quite okie. Heng is Miss Ng if is other teacher i think maybe not that effective. But hor everytime bio so nerve-wrecking. Cuz each class try to sabo the others into answering questions. Then again it can be fun also la.
Yup yup met mum at SGH. Dad changed to normal ward in th evening le! YEAH! All his tubes and wires taken off le, and he looks rosy. Even finish the entire meal! Good good. Just that he still cant walk nor can he get up cuz 0f the wounds.The malay uncle also same ward hehe. At least more fang xin liaoz. Then i allow him to call and talk to his bro, cuz my granddad dun allow my uncle to visit cuz his zodiac clashed with my dad's. Poor uncle wanted to visit him sooo much but cant. So now i allow them to communicate lor cuz that ward can use hp le. Haha then he kept sa jiaoing at my mum. Yucks, so mushy muahaha. It's good though that he can still joke. I asked him to cherish his opportunities *winks*.
Decided to blog cuz i'm feeling better. Haiz tons of test to study, this yr we have Continual Assesments, meaning the CAs will contribute 20% of prelims marks. Damn. Must do well for all the tests now. Oh well.
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
9:11 pm
Yesterday was dreadful and horrible. Wasnt in the mood for anything at all. After sch came hm, wanted to go visit dad but mum and aunt told me not to go. Dad came out of the op at abt 1 plus, and was wheeled into the ICU. He was still unconscious. So we went today instead.
Me,bro and mum arrived at the ICU then we went in and saw dad there. okie, was really intimidated by what's inside. He was awake liao. The nurse was nice and let 3 of us in. Another indian nurse was aunt's friend and she was helpful and friendly. He's weak and quite pale.All those tubes and wiring. HE has got 3 long wounds, cuz 3 of his veins were taken out for the op. After that aunt came also.
We waited in the hosp until 5pm for the 2nd visit. Plus dad will be wheeled to the CICU ard afternn time. Spent the whole day there and then aunt patsy also came.
After dad changed ward, it was dinner time. BUt he does not have appetite. He said it is very painful when he cough and he must use the small pillow to press against his chest. When he ate and coughed, all of us almost died la. So xing tong. He so xing ku. My little cousin sneaked into the room and he was scared too by all the tubes and stuff. He was really shocked to see his uncle like tat. Every time he cough my heart skipped a beat.Dad no appetite also cuz of the tube inserted into his body. I can imagine his pain. But he just smile and refrain himself from speaking too much.
I will be visiting him everyday ba after sch go SGH. Miss Ng is very nice. I requested to take the bio test a little later and i'm glad she understood my situation and allow me to postpone the mon test. Yup. My heartfelt thanks to her. Really no mood la, no mood to go out also. Imagine if it was u or ur relative or your loved one going under the knife, and the body is full of tubes and stuff. Where got mood?? I saw many many patients, serious cases,okie cases and their relatives. So heart wrenching. Haiz. Dun worry also kl, having gone thru so many things, ive matured a lot. And yes A LOT. Nobody will understand wat i have had to gone thru these few years, but i'm glad i still have frens that really care and are always there to support me and listen to me. Even the smallest gestures like the concern msgs really will touch me.
DAd: Ah pa dun think so much la. At least the op is over. I know you are in pain and uncomfort, but that is normal and part of the recovery process. What u have to do now is to eat more so u will have you strength and rest well. Dun tok so much la. And dun worry so much, u sure can transfer to the normal ward soon. See u so fast can talk and look okie, i'm sure a week later u will be even better. We will always be there for you and will visit u everyday. The malay ah pek 70 plus recover faster then u. U must not lose out to him too. We are praying and awaiting your recovery....
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
8:59 pm
THANKS XN FOR REVIVING MY BLOG!!!*hugs*
Just came back from SGH. Went with my bro in the evening, met up with aunt and mum at hosp. Dad seemed quite okie. His op is tml 7.30am. So by afternn shud be in ICU liao. Doc says must stay there at least 2 days like tat. Then this nurse who is aunt's friend took us and 4 other patients with their families to this room to watch the pre and post-op video. Dun wish to comment on wat i saw. All i know is that i cud really feel how much pain there is gg to be after the op. But the most impt thing is to stay positive!
Well then we ate dinner at the cafeteria. Met Chun!! She working at the blood centre as temp job i think. Will be seeing her ard ba. Tml after sch, think i will be rushing down to SGH, or i maybe gg in the evening lor, cuz only 2 person can go in at any one time. Bro and sis not gg la, sis dislocated her knee yesterday, then mum think that if they saw the ICU room, they will be scared, so they can only go i think next week ba.
Fuck la, next week got bio test and chem test i think. Really no mood to study. Will be travelling b/wn sch and hosp. I really dun care if i flunk the stupid tests, i still can take many more tests, but i only have 1 dad. Then i think mum is also under immense pressure. Luckily my aunt is ard to support her.
I think tml morning i will be super distracted. I dun care la. Freaking tests.
Something i read abt:
There is always smthin more impt then fulfilling one's own materialistc needs, if only more pple cud understand this and stop being so self-absorbed.
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
8:30 pm
Now at sch lib trying to dl the bio thingy but hor apparently hang la so the whole world cannot dl...wahaha...today fei one attended 1 math lect then go hm le..but gg out later to buy prezzie la...then go hm slp.There are red patches on my leg again...like red spots all over until my thigh. It's not the 1st time la, doc said it is due to vein burst or leak smthin like tat due to strain on my legs. Yesterday went to test blood haiz. Look so horrifying now. Whaha *cries* . Dad's gg to be admitted tml, so i guess these few days i will be gg to SGH after sch ba. Mum dun allow my sis they all to go, cuz she scared later they see the ICU then they will be scared. Haiz. I think i will also be afraid too but ya try not to think abt it.
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
9:20 am
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
5:04 pm
Love this song from Phantom of the opera
All I ask of you
(Raoul)
No more talk of darkness
Forget these wide-eyed fears
I’m here, nothing can harm you
My words will warm you and calm you
Let me be your freedom
Let daylight dry your tears
I’m here, with you and beside you
To guard you and to guide you
(Christine)
Say you love me every waking moment
Turn my head with talk of summertime
Say you need me with you now and always
Promise me that all you say is true
That's all I ask of you
[Raoul]
Let me be your shelter
Let me be your light
You’re safe, no one will find you
Your fears are far behind you
[Christine]
All I want is freedom
A world with no more night
And you, always beside me
To hold me and to hide me
[Raoul]
Then say you’ll share with me one love, one lifetime
Let me lead you from your solitude
Say you need me with you here, beside you
Anywhere you go, let me go too
Christine, that's all I ask of you
[Christine]
Say you’ll share with me one love, one lifetime
Say the word and I will follow you
[Both]
Share each day with me, each night, each morning
[Christine]
Say you love me
[Raoul]
You know I do
[Both]
Love me, that's all I ask of you
…
Anywhere you go, let me go too
Love me, that's all I ask of you
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
4:55 pm
1st day of Sch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!TJ i'm back!!!!!!!!!!!!
Finally, i'm back to sch again! Had been dreading this day ever since the holiday started. But gg to sch today is different. Many things felt different and there were many changes.
Well, for one, i had to go to sch by myself. No more gg to sch in the comfrot of my dad's car cuz he needs to rest at home. So all of us are gg to sch independently. Woke up at 545am ( so early!!)Took the 615am lrt to compassvale and took 620am bus 27 to tamp. Then took mrt and bus from tanah merah. Yup i noted the timings just in case i will be late. And yes a lot of transportation!!!!!!!!! blah! Well all i can say is that i reached sch for once super early by myself. 710am like tat reach le. For some one who always reached at 740am sharp. its definitely an achievement! kl be proud of me !!!!! haha.
Well sch started with a big news during assembly. Miss panai is no longer our ct. Change to Miss Oh or miss koh, i cant remb the name. Next, we went to class to slack until 10 plus cuz this whole week only lect no tut. We got our new time table and yes release damn early hooray!!!!!!!!!~~~~~~~~3 days i release at 1245pm cuz all periods change to 45mins each liaoz. Tue super slack come to sch for 3 periods only! Good la at least can make use of the time to revise or wat. OKie, then during math lect, same things la, wat is yr 2 life like blah blah blah. Then Mrs Pang said that she is the new HOD math. The original HOD math became the 2nd vice-principal. So we've got 2 vps in the sch! And some other women became HOD student welfare! Interesting.
Bio lect was the most interesting. Miss ng as usual was the lecturer. Daniel Ng will also be teaching one of the classes. We were so worried we will kena him, but heng miss ng never give up our class. Then Miss ng announced all the changes for bio. Wah so many. They will be trying out the new seminar sys. Some topics must print ourselves then go for seminars in groups of 5, abt 90 pple per grp to ask the tutor qns. She said this is because during normal lect pple always give her the u-think-i- understand- wat- u- toking- abt look lolx. So now got more interaction,then dun need waste time during tut reteaching notes. wah. And ya next week got bio test. After that, she showed us slides of pics of the Tsunami disaster. She suddenly became so serious that the whole LT was silent. Never had we seen her so serious before. She then told us abt how we shud cherish wat we have and make our choices wisely. Wat she said really made me reflect and think. She was so inspiring i will never forget wat she said.She mentioned that so many things are happening ard us rite now. Pple lacking food,water,shelter and mourning. Hence we shud not be so self-absorbed. We shud not be thinking abt ourselves only,our complains abt stress is nuthing compared to the pain and suffering of others. So be thankful pple of wat we have in Singapore. Okie i have decided she is my fav tutor in the whole sch. Then she became clownish again blah. So much for seriousness for 15 mins. oh i realised that the entire tj is carrying the converse bag!!!!!! Same as mine but dun haf my colour so far. Wahahahaha*cries*
A girl in my class Yanni, who went for op on her leg came back to join us. i dun know her but her personal nurse came to class and asked us to help her ard in sch. She did her yr 1 then went for op for 2 yrs now came back again. hmm. A new classmate.
Then after that went White sands for lunch with XN,wl and wq. So tired now. Strange felt so tired the entire day, maybe because not use to the time yet hahaha.
All in all i think i kindda love sch. Dunno why. I mean its a fresh start to the year and yup i am feeling all ready to go. BTW need to sign up for lib duty online. Very pro nowadays can choose slots online. hahaha.
Well i think weekends are reserved for my dearest frens ya? haha.
Glad to be back in sch!
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
4:07 pm
Oh ya watched Phantom of the opera last sat 2. Love it! i almost cried at th end! However, be warned , if u hate musicals avoid watching. Cuz the entire movie, they sang out everything, only minimal talking and conversations. But i love the songs and graphics!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Though some parts dun underestand i love the Phantom and Raul. *faints* I want to buy the soundtrack!!!!!!!!!!!~~~~~~~~
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
9:58 pm
YEAH THE LIONS ARE GOING INTO THE FINALS!!!!
The match was super exciting and dramatic. It's got every thing, extra wet and muddy pitch,supporters from both teams,red cards, fouls,penalty,fighting,pushing conflict and sending offs, super dramatic. Due to the rain, the pitch at the National Stadium was so wet and muddy. Myanmar's striker scored the 1st goal in the first 15mins, then they took in another goal due to the miscalculation of sg keeper lionel lewis. Trailing 0-2, the lions tried but didnt perform well enough, when all was lost, Noh alam Sha head the ball in and 1 myanmar guy kicked it in !! haha own goal!!! So funny. Then this guy got 2 yellow and so was given a red card in the 2nd half. 11 players to 10. Then Indra got a penalty cuz the 1 guy tripped him. But he missedthe penalty!!! The guy that tripped him was so angry that he kicked mud on the japanese refree and so was also given the red card!!!!!! LOLX. 11 men to 9. Then i think there was another player either injured or sent off also. Total of 4 red cards given off in the game. So the game went into 30 mins extra time as we lost this leg of the game. So it was 11 men to 8 men. Singapore miraculously won the game due to players' advantage. Easy as pie. Haha. Then i also remb when two guys got conflict, and Mani frm SG tried to break them apart, a water bottle was thrown at his face from the myanmar players' stand. The commentator was saying how disgraceful this was. lolx. Poor mani. Then they caught the culprit, a sub goal keeper from myanmar. lolx.
Definitely an interesting game happening at the ever peaceful singapore. I think the crowd was shocked too to see the game played so violently. The players should have to be more discipline, anyways it was an amusing game to watch :P
"You leave me SPEECHLESS, when you talk to me."
3:44 pm
